Yellow-Girl

She's stubborn; my secret lover She's got me wrapped around her fingers The same fingers she jams down my gullet Maneuvering, manipulating Thus eliminating, regurgitating Anxiety evacuating Her victim slowly disintegrating

They're interchangeable They've already forgotten your face Though you've only been gone for an instant Someone has taken your place And it doesn't matter where you go It will be the same People are interchangeable They'll forget your name And the seasons aren't seasons anymore Everyone is keeping score In this game that never ends We circle the board again

Troublesome notions exalted within Disturbing, yet alluring Bubbling beneath the skin Her delicate hands resting lifelessly She staggers to the mirror and examines carefully A silhouette unpleasing Silent voices multiply Disgusted with an illusion She can only close her eyes Her lips crack as she inhales Her brittle nails fold Irregular heartbeat Frigid fingers Frigid toes

Sometimes, more often than before I am crippled Things are stale and flat People are crooked and I am bitter What is stability I need something tangible It all seems impossible It's all too strenuous Can I salvage my identity They're suffocating me And I'm exhausted

The steady beating of the rain Suspending each unstable thought Thick and warm, suffocating the icicles which have formed physically and mentally Lulling myself into a deep sleep Spring, I have been pining